Patterns

Those of you who know me well know that there are certain patterns that I tend to follow in life. Those of you who don't know me well, or even at all, probably could have guessed this, as I think it's a universal truth for fallen humans.

Yesterday was fantastic. While there were times when I struggled with the sheer amount of time in a day and the ingrained impulse to fill the hours as quickly as possible, I was able to turn that impulse over to God and spend the day in a simple way. I spent hours praying, reading, meditating on Scripture, picking up a few fresh vegetables at the farmer's market, going for a run on the lakefront, talking with dear friends... I ended the day feeling refreshed, invigorated, and excited for the coming weeks.

Today I woke up sore. Here's where the pattern comes in. First, my circumstances change in a way that forces me to reconsider some or all of the things I'm doing. Second, I decide on new things with which I'd like to replace the old things, and I do those new things with renewed energy and enthusiasm. Third, I wake up groggy, sore, and distracted, and I chuckle at the seeming naiveté of the previous day's list of resolutions.

But the Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. He is never surprised by my weaknesses; instead, His power is made perfect as it works through them. So I pray that He would build in me a discipline that I cannot build in myself, and that He would be gracious enough to help me step aside as He works in and through me.