tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-78795151815878119042024-03-03T23:18:40.040-08:00Life by (His) grace, for (His) gloryMolly Katherine McKinneyMollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.comBlogger141125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-51745172150458267812013-10-08T23:27:00.003-07:002013-10-08T23:27:46.202-07:00October update (and what's coming in the next few years!)<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Hi there, friends!</span><br />
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It's been an eventful few months, and it's hard to believe we have just six weeks left before we return to the States... and then a month after that we get married!</div>
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This will (by necessity) be a long email, so feel free to fast forward to the Short Version at the end...</div>
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In September we sent our seven Discipleship Training School students and two staff leaders off to Ukraine, where they have been ministering among orphans, in schools, teaching English, speaking in churches, and generally loving on the people they meet. Since then, Geoff and I have been busy hosting friends from the States (such a blessing!), resolving visa issues, and praying about direction for the next couple of years.</div>
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Geoff's visa expired earlier this year, and two applications, a considerable amount of confusion, and about $1000 later, we're hoping things have been smoothed over. He currently has an application in place for a visa extension of 2 years, which would give him plenty of time to fundraise and apply for residency here in the UK (a long, drawn-out process, which is why we weren't able to do it this year).</div>
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Once we got everything sorted out with his visa, Geoff and I were blessed by our base leaders with the chance to take a couple of days away at the other Scottish YWAM base, a beautiful mansion on the west coast of Scotland. We did puzzles, walked on the beach, explored castles, read books, and had hours of face-to-face time to talk and pray about our future. At the end of it, here's what we decided:</div>
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We are committing to two more years here at YWAM Paisley, living in Stanely House and investing in the base during this transitional season. We've been given a couple of rooms to turn into an apartment that will allow us some privacy for these first couple of years of marriage. There are quite a few reasons why this seems like the best choice for us (feel free to ask if you'd like to know more!), but suffice it to say we are confident and excited and at peace about this, and we are looking forward to growing together and with the base in this next season.</div>
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The specifics have yet to be hammered out, but some possibilities on the horizon are: discipling young people on the yearly DTS, leading worship and teaching at our church and at the base, Geoff will continue with the men's group he has started, I'm looking into investing in chickens and a garden here at the base for a more sustainable food source, partnering with a nonprofit that mentors young artists and musicians in the community, growing in our own musical gifts, and much more!</div>
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And hopefully hosting many more of our dear friends and family when they come for a visit? We have plenty of room...!</div>
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At any rate, we're excited, thriving in our relationships with each other and the Lord, looking forward to coming home and celebrating with all of you, and looking ahead with expectant hearts to see what these next few years will bring. Bless you all!</div>
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The Short Version (or Please Pray):</div>
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- Geoff has applied for a visa extension. Please pray that it comes back with a yes on it by November 19 so we can travel home!</div>
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- We have committed to 2 more years here at YWAM Paisley, living at the base. Please pray for finances to make over our little apartment, for vision and direction for which ministries to invest in, and for wisdom in setting boundaries and living our first years of marriage well in a community context.</div>
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- Finances are still a bit tight. We have been so blessed in our support-raising, but we're still about $160/month short of our (conservative) monthly support goal. Would you consider partnering with us on a monthly basis, no matter how small? In addition, this visa renewal just about drained our bank accounts. Would you consider a one-time gift (or a wedding gift) toward our honeymoon or the renovation of our apartment?</div>
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Checks can be sent to:</div>
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Journey Church</div>
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PO Box 1016</div>
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Walla Walla, WA 99362</div>
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with a note specifying that they are for me/us.</div>
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Again, bless you and thank you all, and we hope to see many of you this Christmas!</div>
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Molly and Geoff</div>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-54955001755142534502013-02-16T11:39:00.003-08:002013-02-16T11:39:39.748-08:00Mzungu wange: final reflections on UgandaI'm in Paisley, Scotland now. Wearing more layers than I remembered was physically possible, looking out over the city of Glasgow, staying in a glorious old mansion that has been re-purposed into a YWAM base, and trying to wrap my mind around the fact that five days ago my season in Uganda came to an end. It seems impossible that it's over, and at the same time it's as if it all happened years ago.<br />
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On one of my last days, one of the neighbor children made a permanent impression on my heart and wrapped up my entire stay in Uganda in one phrase: "Mzungu wange!" or "My white girl!"<br />
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When I came to Africa, I was at first enraptured and then overwhelmed. Being <a href="http://lifebygraceforglory.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/white.html">white</a> seemed an impossible obstacle to overcome, and I was so discouraged by the feeling of being an inevitable outsider in every situation. The children reminded me of it around every corner: "Mzungu! Mzungu!" "White girl! White girl!" But I pressed on, and days and weeks turned into months, and Uganda began to feel like home. After spending six weeks in Tanzania and then returning to Hopeland, I was surprised to find how familiar and comfortable it felt-- I know this place! I can do this!<br />
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I cannot possibly, in one update or a hundred, express the depth of love, the friendships, the challenges and blessings, the heartbreaks and highs, of my six months in Uganda. How the red dirt became a comforting second skin, how the blue sky and hot sun placed a blanket of familiarity over every day, how the rain smelled like lemon and mint and filled my soul. How the sticky, dirty hands of the sweetest children on Earth ministered to my heart and left indelible marks on my ukulele. How the rhythm-- slow, consistent, repetitive, and so dear-- of friendship and conversation and work and community worked its way into my very being. How my heart felt that last hour in the Entebbe airport: broken, alone, and incredulous that it happened at all and that it was over.<br />
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I gave Uganda my everything, and it made me its own. "Mzungu wange!" I'm still white, but I belong. I am beloved and adopted and known-- and now, missed. I am Uganda's, and Uganda is mine. Across continents and seas and seasons until I return again, I carry it inside me, and I am changed for good and for the very best.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-40726290521325906502013-01-26T04:00:00.000-08:002013-01-26T04:00:02.891-08:00Mumford & PsalmsI listen to a lot of Mumford & Sons in seasons of transition. There's something epic, sojourning, traveler-esque about Mumford that I find comfort in-- if my heart is broken and my life is in upheaval, it's on a quest for something great and vast and worth it. I have spent a lot of time in the past year leaning my head on the window of a moving vehicle, listening to Mumford.<br />
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Today I discovered the perfect cocktail: Mumford & Psalms.<br />
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So give me hope in the darkness that I'll see the light<br />
'Cause oh, they gave me such a fright<br />
But I will hope as long as you like<br />
Just promise me we'll be alright<br />
-Mumford & Sons, "Ghosts That We Knew"<br />
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But as for me, my prayer is to you, O Lord.<br />
At an acceptable time, O God,<br />
in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness.<br />
-Psalm 69:13<br />
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I'll kneel down, wait for now<br />
I'll kneel down, know my ground<br />
Raise my hands, paint my spirit gold<br />
And bow my head, keep my heart slow<br />
'Cause I will wait, I will wait for you<br />
I will wait, I will wait for you<br />
-Mumford & Sons, "I Will Wait"<br />
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Be to me a rock of refuge,<br />
to which I may continually come.<br />
I will hope continually<br />
and will praise you yet more and more.<br />
-Psalm 71:3, 14<br />
There will come a time, you'll see, with no tears<br />
And love will not break your heart but dismiss your fears <br />
Get over your hill and see what you find there<br />
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair<br />
-Mumford & Sons, "After the Storm"<br />
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Father of the fatherless and protector of widows<br />
is God in his holy habitation.<br />
God settles the solitary in a home.<br />
-Psalm 68:5-6<br />
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For you, O God, have tested us;<br />
you have tried us as silver is tried.<br />
We went through fire and through water;<br />
yet you have brought us out to a place of abundance.<br />
Come and hear, all you who fear God,<br />
and I will tell what he has done for my soul.<br />
-Psalm 66:10, 12, 16Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-80516659590535713562013-01-23T06:52:00.001-08:002013-01-23T06:52:35.846-08:00What you are, what you have, is enoughThere's a bit of insecurity and social awkwardness in me that comes out from time to time, especially when I find myself anticipating transition. Regardless of how far I get in life, how many positive experiences I have in new places, and how many times I successfully begin friendships, preparation for moving to a new place inevitably finds me nervously trying to figure out who I am. Or who I'm going to be in this new place. I'm a twelve-year-old girl moving to a new junior high school, looking for the opportunity to reinvent myself.<br />
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I'm heading to Scotland in a few weeks' time, hoping to volunteer with a YWAM base of intimidatingly hip and beautiful musicians and lovers of Jesus, reaching out to other intimidatingly hip and beautiful musicians and artists. And I've spent the last six months showering by sticking my head under a tap, shaving my legs on a bimonthly basis, putting on three or four boldly and differently patterned items of clothing in the morning, looking in a four-inch-wide mirror and thinking, "Hey, not bad!" I'm not sure I remember how to be Western anymore, leave alone hip and beautiful, or if I'll even be able to understand people with Scottish accents in the first place.<br />
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At least, that's how I feel when I'm being irrational.<br />
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So this morning, I came to Jesus, and He reminded me of the same thing He told me when I came here six months ago. "What you are, what you have, is enough. Your experiences, your relationship with Me, your heart itself... you don't have to <i>be</i> or <i>do</i> anything. You are enough."<br />
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And I remembered that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and my story is unfolding in a fearful and wonderful fashion, and I am loved by and in love with a fearful and wonderful God. And the same is true for all of the hip and beautiful musicians and artists, and everyone else that is wondering how to inhabit a world full of hip and beautiful people. We are, all of us, fearful and wonderful bundles of flesh and blood, heart and nerves, spirit and soul and history, sharing a world with each other, being Christ to one another, glorifying Him by our very being. We are fragile and vulnerable and wide open to dangers, and we impact each other for better or worse, and when we love each other, we bring His Kingdom and see His face.<br />
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And so now I'm less intimidated by the mysterious people and more in awe of how this all works and how I get to be a part of it and how He walks through it with me. I'm excited to go to Scotland.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-4901542702775031612013-01-16T05:38:00.001-08:002013-01-16T05:38:10.603-08:00On loving deeplyThursday, August 16, in the London Heathrow airport on the way here, I wrote: "It's worth it to love, even when it makes the goodbyes harder. It's
worth it to take a risk, even though there's that moment of limbo before
the path becomes clear. It's worth it to go full-tilt after the dream."<br />
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And now, a full cycle later, here I am. I have mourned the goodbyes, felt overwhelmed in a new place, and decided anyway to invest in relationships without counting the cost. I have tested the waters, taken risks, asked questions, opened my heart, pressed on through conflict and confusion, shared joy and sorrow and anger and apathy. I have opened up a space in my life and allowed others to occupy it. I have loved deeply.<br />
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Is it worth it?<br />
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Every day this week I have said goodbye to at least one person and at least one piece of my heart. Every day this week I have cried. Every day this week I have begun adjusting to life without someone, only to say goodbye again.<br />
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Is it worth it?<br />
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These past few days I haven't quite known how to live. I wake up in the
morning with a hole in my heart. I laugh at the ever-present reminders
of all the shared jokes, but there's a hollow ache when the jokes are no
longer shared. I go through my days viewing every person as a potential
goodbye-- better keep my distance, this one's just a matter of time.<br />
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Is it worth it?<br />
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It would have been a lot easier to stay closed-off and safe, sporting a grand "no-entry" sign. It would have been easier to disengage and walk away the moment it became difficult. It would be easier now to bury myself in work and dreaming and even Jesus, all things I can count on never to leave me. Even now, it's a choice.<br />
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So is it worth it?<br />
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Pieces of my heart are missing, but they are not dead. Pieces of my heart have come alive, broken off (yes, it's painful), and taken flight to the corners of the world. Those pieces of my heart continue living, blessing, transforming their environments, safeguarded within the hearts of those I love. And bits of their hearts have taken root in my own. My heart has become mosaic, colorful, vibrant, diverse, growing, wise, and more alive than it was six months ago. It is part of a bigger system, a network, vines interwoven and interdependent and only really alive through connection and contact. It is messy, it is complicated, it is like a system of nerves that allow me to feel both a sting and a caress.<br />
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But it is worth it.<br />
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And I<b> will </b>do it again.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-77516007917783518932013-01-13T04:26:00.000-08:002013-01-13T04:26:21.208-08:001/13/13 UPDATE: DTS... here's to you.Cheers to the furrows on our brow,<br />to each hard-won victory.<br />Cheers to the losses that grew us up,<br />killed our pride, and filled our cup.<br /><br />Cheers to the friendships well worn-in<br />that neither time nor distance alter;<br />
here's to the sleepers we'll see again,<br />fine company in memoriam.<br /><br />Cheers to the passing of our youth<br />and the death of lust, not wonder;<br />a toast to the lessons not yet learned<br />and to the trials that will teach them.<br />
<br />Open your mouth and sing out your song;<br />life is short as the day is long.<br />I can't leave you my body, but I'll leave you a tune...<br />This is my legacy;<br />here's to you.<br /><br />-Brooke Fraser, Here's to You<br />
<br />I love Brooke Fraser for many reasons, including that her music
often seems to express my heart exactly. After five long, arduous,
joyful, packed, challenging, life-changing months, the DTS is over. We
arrived back from our outreach locations of Dar Es Salaam and Arusha (my
team), Tanzania, on Tuesday morning after a blessedly uneventful bus
ride (with the exception of a few exciting baboons on the road) and
watched the few days fly by too quickly until our graduation and the
inevitable but dreaded goodbyes. Yesterday we celebrated thoroughly, and
this morning I was up at 5 to see off some of my dearest friends as
they headed back to their home countries of Congo, Tanzania, and Kenya.
My heart absolutely broke as we all wept in each other's arms and said
our farewells, but as the day has gone on I've been able to reflect and
thank God for the miracle of the last five months. We've transformed
from a random assortment of young people from 10 different nations and
43 different life stories to a family, united in love after months of
living, laughing, fighting, mourning, and facing each day together.
Praise God with me, will you? I have learned to love deeper and through
harder obstacles than I ever expected to know how, and I have gained
true brothers and sisters all over the world. I know that God brought us
together, united us in His love as He brought us to and through each
trial, and will go out with us again as we head our separate ways, and I
thank Him for the life of each of these beautiful people.<br />
<br />I'll try to update the blog with more reflections and details in the
coming weeks as I process everything, but for now I'll attempt to
summarize it all in two paragraphs!<br /><br />OUTREACH. 32 people from 8
nations living in a house together for 6 weeks, sharing one pit latrine
and two showers, sleeping 3-to-a-mattress, fetching water from a quarter
mile away each morning for all of the cooking, drinking, cleaning, and
bathing, ministering in hot weather and across language barriers,
overcoming massive personality differences, unable to get personal space
for 3 minutes in a day, away from our families for the holidays, making
decisions together, dealing with a couple of major medical emergencies,
and here's the miracle: we got on the bus at the end of the six weeks
so indescribably united and knit together in love. How does that even
happen?? (By the grace of God.) Oh, we had our moments. We had our
screaming fights, our days of the silent treatment, and maybe more than
our fair share of tears, but we pressed through. We chose to love each
other, to work through it, to forgive and continue to care for each
other each day, to see each other at our worst and not hold it against
each other, and we came out the other side with relationships brilliant
and refined by the fire. We ministered in leprosy homes, with street
children, in churches and hospitals and public parks and orphanages,
through generosity and love and prayer and preaching and service and
dancing and fun, as we learned to listen to God and walk out what He
gave us to do. Don't get me wrong, there were moments I would have
hopped on the first plane home, but now that it's all finished, I
wouldn't trade it for the whitest Christmas in the world.<br />
<br />WHAT'S NEXT? Now that I'm an official YWAMer, I'm staying here at
the Hopeland base for four weeks, until February 10. I'll be helping
around the base mostly in the area of admin and publications (website,
videos, brochures, you name it), but also leading interactive, extended
worship nights (creating an environment for worship through art,
reading, journaling, dancing, singing, sitting, every way you can engage
with the Lord) and hopefully making a few visits to the orphanage we
found on our mini-outreach back in October. After that, it's off to the
UK and Ireland for two months. Things aren't officially in place, but
the plan is to spend six weeks at the YWAM Paisley base outside of
Glasgow, Scotland, helping them to get their prayer house started (see
above description of worship nights) and then to travel around and visit
friends and family and see the sites of Scotland, Wales, Ireland, and
Northern Ireland. On April 10, I fly into Portland, OR, and begin what I
hope will be a summer of visiting as many people as possible, perhaps
by buying an Amtrak 30-day rail pass and fulfilling my lifelong dream of
taking a cross-country train journey, in which I visit people all over
America! I'll also be attending a plethora of weddings. After the
summer, God only knows for sure, but I'm hoping to go somewhere
long-term (for the next couple years, at least) through YWAM. Which
"somewhere" remains to be determined.<br />
<br />I did it in two paragraphs! I'll close by saying THANK YOU so much
for all of your prayers and financial support that make this life
possible. I am so supported and so loved and so blessed to be living the
fulfillment of all the dreams God has placed in my heart, and I thank
Him so much that you are partnering with me in that process. Words can't
express it. Thank you, and God bless you.<br />
<br />Love,<br />MollyMollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-78363859084961780072012-11-23T22:19:00.001-08:002012-11-23T22:19:22.095-08:0011/24/12 UPDATE: Final pre-outreach updateHi there!<br /><br />I've been notified that my last update (November 9) may
have gone to spam folders for many of you (too much bolding, McKinney).
For your reading convenience, I've posted it at my blog (find it <a href="http://lifebygraceforglory.blogspot.com/2012/11/update-repentance-reconciliation.html" target="_blank">here</a>), and I will henceforth refrain from bolding every other sentence.<br />
<br />I recommend reading that one first, but if you're crunched for time,
here's the reader's digest version: I'm heading to Arusha, Tanzania
this Thursday with a team of 25 students and 3 leaders! We'll be there
for a little over 5 weeks (our start date has been delayed due to
passport issues) doing evangelism, mercy ministry, church ministry, and
anything else God puts in our path... we don't really know specifics as
of yet. We have a place to stay for the first two weeks, and from there
we'll just pray and stay open to possibilities that we come across. So
stay tuned for the post-outreach update, which will have much more
information!<br />
<br />For now, some praise and prayer points:<br />-Praise: We successfully
completed the 3-month lecture phase with every student that began the
course. There were some sickness and visa issues that threatened this,
but we've all come back together in time for the outreach, and we're so
thankful! We feel like a family, and it's hard when any one person is
missing.<br />
-Praise: The Americans on base were able to get together (with the help
and company of our British base leaders and a handful of friends from
other nations) and celebrate Thanksgiving with a real Thanksgiving
dinner, turkey and all! It meant so much to all of us to be able to
celebrate in a way that felt like home.<br />
-Pray: For our outreach team. For unity, safety, love for each other and
those we're serving, energy and health on a busy schedule, and for
God's guidance in every day of our ministry. And for me-- I'm one of two
student leaders for the team, so pray for God to work through me and
use me in this role.<br />
-Pray: For my heart during this holiday season. I love it here and know
beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is where I'm meant to be, but the
holidays are a hard time to be away from loved ones any way you slice
it. Pray that my joy, home, and family with be in Jesus.<br />
-Pray: That I will see a giraffe. I'd really like to see a giraffe. And a
zebra. And I'd especially like to see a lion, though they tell me
that's doubtful.<br />-Pray: For God's guidance for my post-DTS plans.
I've had some really exciting opportunities come up for the next two
years, and I'm in the process of praying and sifting through them.<br />
<br />I'll be quite limited in my use of the internet for the five weeks
following Thursday, but I always love reading your emails whenever I get
them, so keep me posted! And, as I know you do, keep me in your
prayers... I'm so grateful for all of your prayers, love, and support.
And, in case I don't get a chance to say it, Merry Christmas and a Happy
New Year!<br />
<br />Love,<br />MollyMollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-14875148825573411762012-11-23T21:48:00.001-08:002012-11-23T21:49:52.979-08:0011/9/12 UPDATE: Repentance & reconciliation, outreach plans, malaria, electrocution, and a wedding!<div>
How's that for a title? Yes, it's been a crazy month.</div>
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<b>Reconciliation</b></div>
<div>
In my last email,<b> I asked for prayer for unity in our DTS,</b> and especially in our room. <b>God has answered your prayers swiftly, powerfully, and thoroughly</b>.
A few days after the email, our room had a meeting and talked through
the things that we were struggling with, and the culture of our room
changed that day. Most of the hurts had been unintentional, through
miscommunications and assumptions, mixed with a little selfishness on
all of our parts, but<b> we have seen such a shift towards love, humility, and service</b>. Praise the LORD!</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
And this morning... I don't really even know how to
describe this morning. I had read about times like this, but I had never
experienced it for myself on such a large scale before. We, as a whole
DTS, were having a time of prayer for our upcoming outreach, and the
Holy Spirit came with such <b>a flood of repentance over the whole group...</b> for hours, we were <b>weeping
and confessing our selfishness and weakness and sin to God and to each
other, humbling ourselves and acknowledging our need for Him</b>. By the end of the time, <b>all
bitterness and discouragement had melted away, the feeling of disunity
was gone, and we as a DTS had come to a new level of love for each
other, commitment, awe, and submission to God, and excitement about what
He's going to do in our remaining two months</b>. One girl had
even changed her plane ticket a month ago to go home next week, and by
the end of this morning she had changed her mind and is so excited to
join us for the outreach and finish the DTS. No one could put a finger
on what we needed as a group, but God knew and brought it to pass,
because He is faithful and powerful and loving. We are walking in our
forgiveness and redemption, and we are excited to go forth in love and
unity and share the good news!</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<b>Outreach Plans</b></div>
<div>
Speaking of sharing the good news, the outreach plans/teams have been announced!<b> I'll be going with a team of about 30 people to Arusha, Tanzania for six weeks starting November 24</b>.
We'll stay there in Arusha, partnering with local churches to share the
gospel and minister to the hurting and needy in any way we can, whether
in hospitals or ministries for street children or anything else that
comes up. It's a bittersweet time, as I'll be separated from many of the
people I've become closest to, but I know God has a perfect plan, and I
cannot wait to see what He'll do during this next season!</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<b>Malaria/Health Needs</b></div>
<div>
As many of you know through Facebook,<b> I had my first run-in with malaria about two weeks ago</b>. <b>I'm doing much better now</b>,
thanks to God and your prayers and the doctor we have here on base, but
I certainly don't recommend malaria! Days of high fevers (staying
between 103-104, around 40 Celsius, for about 3 days), uncontrollable
shivering, aching head and body, and no sleeping or eating, accompanied
by a medication that makes you even sicker, weaker, and wildly
emotional... but the students and staff around me took care of me and
celebrated with me when I was finally able to get up out of bed.<b>
Thanks so much for your prayers and all your notes of encouragement-- I
can't express how much that meant to me while going through such a
rough time.</b></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
One of my best friends here, Humphreys, a Ugandan staff
member, was also hospitalized this week with malaria, typhoid, and
stomach ulcers. We almost lost him, and it got a little scary for a few
days, but he's home on the base as of last night and has the life back
in his eyes. Thanks for your prayers for him as well-- he says without
them, he knows he would have died. <b>There have been several major
health needs among the students and staff in the last few weeks,
leading to large hospital bills for several of my close friends.</b>
Healthcare is inexpensive here, by Western standards, but a hospital
bill of $200 can be crippling for an African YWAMer living by faith... <b>Please
pray for provision, and if God puts it on your heart to give anything
towards the hospital bills for Humphreys, Arafat, Florence, or
Steven, please send it to Journey Church/1491 W Rose St./Walla Walla, WA
99362</b> with a note that it is for me, and also send me an email
letting me know the amount you are sending-- sometimes it takes a
little while for the money to make it through the mail and into my
account and to my attention (I do live in Africa).</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
I also got electrocuted! No lasting damage except for a
small scar on my foot, but apparently sometimes live wires are just
lying on the ground, and when you take your high heels off after a long
day of being a bridesmaid, you can step on them and burn the tissues
inside your foot and also feel the electricity all the way into your
shoulders. So that was a new experience.</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<b>Wedding</b></div>
<div>
Speaking of the
wedding, I got to be a bridesmaid in my Canadian friend Chasity and my
Ugandan friend Nixon's wedding this last weekend. It was a long day,
especially after having malaria all week, but it was an honor and a joy
to get to stand with Chasity on her special day, as so many of her
friends are so far across the world.</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<b>Closing Remarks/Prayer Points</b></div>
<div>
I'll
send at least one more update before leaving for outreach, and I hope
to write a few blog updates (on repentance, being wealthy and living
among the poor, and maybe waiting on the Lord) this weekend, but for
now, here's how you can pray:</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
-<b>Outreach preparation.</b> Unity for the teams, wisdom for the leaders as they plan, and provision, protection, and fruitfulness as we go.</div>
<div>
-<b>Health and hospital bills. </b>Pray
for health for our DTS-- the last few weeks we've seen more sickness
than we ever want to again-- and for provision for the hospital bills
that have come up, especially for students and staff who don't have the
resources to pay for them.</div>
<div>
-<b>Continued outpouring.</b> Pray that God will continue what He started this morning, in each of our hearts and in us as a team. It's so good!</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
Thanks so much, and all my love to each of you!</div>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-47834804379522963682012-10-12T02:15:00.000-07:002012-10-12T02:15:05.576-07:00EmptyIf thou could'st empty all thyself of self,<br />
Like to a shell dishabited,<br />
Then might He find thee on the ocean shelf,<br />
And say, 'This is not dead',<br />
And fill thee with Himself instead.<br />
<br />
But thou art all replete with very thou<br />
And hast such shrewd activity,<br />
That when He comes, He says, 'This is enow<br />
Unto itself - 'twere better let it be,<br />
It is so small and full, there is no room for Me.<br />
<br />
-Sir Thomas Browne<br />
<br />
This is one of my favorite poems, and it seems I come back to it in every new season of life. I know it's not my first time writing about it on this blog.<br />
<br />
The past three weeks have been a process of emptying, or maybe more of being emptied by my circumstances. I came into our mini-outreach (the most taxing time yet on the DTS) already discouraged and drained of all of my resources (I thought). As the days continued on, I would find some small, untouched resource and use that, waking up each morning feeling like I had even less to offer than I had the day before.<br />
<br />
But here's the thing. It's a little like cleaning, I think. As long as the room is still full of stuff all over, there's a limited amount of cleaning that can happen. You can sweep, maybe mop, dust a little, but you know you're just scratching the surface. If you put everything away and maybe scoot the furniture around, you can get a pretty good cleaning done, but the room is still the same and you know there's some grime sticking to the bottoms and backs of things. But when you take everything out, empty the furniture and move it, bring the room back to the empty shell it was when it started, potential happens. You also, unfortunately, are forced to remember where you've been using furniture to cover holes in the wall and mismatched patches where you ran out of the right paint.<br />
<br />
So that's been me. Every day, a little less furniture, a little less stuff, a little less "me". Every day, a deeper cleaning, a hollower chest, a longer time waiting in my quiet time with the Lord. ("No, seriously, God. I actually CAN'T do this day unless You do it for me."). And every day, more freedom, more potential, deeper peace when that potential is filled by the rushing in of His Spirit and the miracle of His using my empty shell.<br />
<br />
It's hard, and I'll be honest when I say I'm praying that it's only a season, but it's worth it. Go deeper, get lower, let Him root it all out, and find out what real fullness feels like.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-2907397145764204112012-10-12T01:57:00.002-07:002012-10-12T01:57:38.345-07:00The Restoration of Peter"There's nothing you can do to make God love you more, and there's nothing you can do to make Him love you less. He loves you because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because that is what He is like." -Jonathan David Helser<br />
<br />
Peter is a simple fisherman, going through his daily routine. Jesus finds him where he is and changes the course of his life by calling him: "Follow me."<br />
<br />
Peter walks through three years with Jesus, seeing the miracles, the kindness, the power, the authority, the humility, the meekness, the perfectness of Him.<br />
<br />
Jesus humbles Himself before Peter, sharing a meal with him, washing His feet, spending time with him.<br />
<br />
Jesus predicts His death, and Peter vows his allegiance, promises his faithfulness to the very end. Jesus predicts Peter's denial in triplicate that very night.<br />
<br />
The guards come for Jesus, and Peter draws a sword and attacks in violence and emotion-- still dedicated to Jesus. Jesus sheathes the sword and goes peacefully with the men.<br />
<br />
As Jesus is beaten, mocked, tortured, Peter warms himself by the fire. But his heart is cooling. "I wasn't with Him. <i>(One.)</i> I don't know Him. <i>(Two.) </i>I swear to God I've never even met the man! <i>(Three.)</i>"<br />
<br />
The rooster crows, Peter remembers, and his heart breaks.<br />
<br />
The next day, Jesus dies. Peter never had an opportunity to make it right.<br />
<br />
When the news of the resurrection comes, Peter's heart leaps and then crashes. Jesus is alive, but I've ruined my chance. Peter goes back to fishing.<br />
<br />
Jesus finds Peter where he is. He joins him in what he's doing. He cooks him breakfast. And then He pulls him aside.<br />
<br />
"Peter, do you love me?" "You know I love you." <i>(One.)</i><br />
"Peter, do you love me?" "You know I love you." <i>(Two.)</i><br />
"Peter, do you love me?" "Lord, You know all things; You know I love You!" <i>(Three.)</i><br />
<br />
Jesus changes the course of his life by calling him again: "Follow me."<i> </i> <br />
<br />
You cannot fall beyond the reach of God's love and restoration. You cannot lose His call on your life. He is the father of the prodigal son, He is the God of Romans 8:38-39, and there is nothing and no one that can separate you from His love. Not even you.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-46473525557518000042012-10-12T01:10:00.001-07:002012-10-12T01:10:02.651-07:00White<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="font-size: small;">Hey kids, I'm white. I'm English, Welsh, Scottish, German... really white. Maybe in the States I pride myself on the ability to develop a nice tan with little effort, but let's face it: I'm white, and will always be white.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="font-size: small;">Here's an excerpt from an email to my parents this last week: </span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><i>The last few weeks have been a reality check about the very real
difficulties of serving here as a white person. It's the first time my
race has been something I'm forced to think about every single day, the
first time being white has limited me and put me in danger, the first
time I've been so aware of prejudices and stereotypes based on my skin
color. It's a heavy thing, especially realizing that this is the reality
of life for many of my friends in the States, and that I've been
privileged never to experience it.</i></span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><i>I will
always stand out. Even if I were to live in this Walla-Walla-sized town
my entire life, do all my shopping at the market, make close friendships
with the locals, I would still walk down the street to a chorus of
"mzungu, mzungu!" (white person, white person) every day, still pay
twice as much for everything, still be a target for theft, still get
lied to about everything by people looking for a soft heart and deep
pockets... Even if I learn the language, the culture, adapt the style of
dress, I will always be the "other" here, and that is hard.</i></span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
</div>
<div style="font-family: inherit;">
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><i>On a somewhat more temporary note, it's been a humbling thing to
find that the skills I've developed and valued so much in the States
don't translate here. I'm not able to be
on the worship team because all of the songs are in Swahili or Luganda,
and the words are made up as they go along. My music is appreciated,
but as a novelty, not as a means of deep community and fellowship as it
has been.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><i>When I go to communicate, I have to
simplify my language so much to traverse the language and dialect
barriers (not to mention managing completely different cultural
contexts) that it's hard for me to express anything deeper than a
surface-level idea. It's hard to be going through so much transition and
not to be able to express what I'm feeling to the people around me. And
it's hard to feel like a leader in our class, which is a position I'm
in given my age and life experience compared to many of the others, when
any time I speak in class, I'm met by blank stares. It seems like it
doesn't matter how much I simplify and slow down, the response is
generally an apologetic smile and "I'm sorry, I'm not sure we caught
that."</i></span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;">In other words, I feel limited and sometimes even useless because of my race and cultural background, and that's a hard pill to swallow. I know I'm called here, but will I always be such an outsider?</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;">And an excerpt from my dad's response:</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-size: small;">It's great to hear your thoughts and reflections-- even if they're not all pleasant. Which of course is what
you'd expect, even hope for really, in the situation you've chosen... It's
not supposed to be fun, only interesting.... Which doesn't preclude fun of
course, and what is fun anyway?</span></i><br />
<br />
<i><span style="font-size: small;">But your realism is good to hear. The question is can you still be helpful
even given all the barriers: racial, language, cultural? I'll bet the
answer is at least kinda yes. And if so, what's the best way to be
helpful? Do the folks (white, that is) eventually find that they can, if
not fit in, at least work effectively as the outsiders they'll always
be? What are the best skills to cultivate in order to be
helpful?</span></i><br />
<br />
<i><span style="font-size: small;">Hopefully having a purpose can give
you the occasional shot of enough energy to keep it positive. It's not about fun. But that's never been your style anyway.</span></i><br />
<br />
<i><span style="font-size: small;">Anyway no real words of wisdom here, just
perseverance. You may ultimately decide the culture gap is too big, but in
retrospect this is bound to be a giant life event no matter what you decide
about how productive it is. I'm sympathizing here big time, but I'm
jealous big time too. You're going for it. Life is too short not to,
and so many folks don't realize that. There are a lot of things I'd like
to go back and have another shot at-- you're in the middle of one of
them. So I'm sure proud of what you're stuck in the middle of, no
matter what you decide to do with it.</span></i><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">He says "no real wisdom here," but I beg to differ. I'm sharing both of these because I think this is such a common experience. In my words, maybe you can find something that resonates with your own feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and frustration. And in my dad's, maybe you'll find just enough encouragement and perspective to keep you going-- I know I did.</span><i><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></i></div>
</div>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-36830259796950452402012-09-06T06:03:00.002-07:002012-09-06T06:03:56.306-07:00Childish hopes<span class="userContent">"All the thrill of boyhood dreams came on me just now, watching the sky die in the sea on every side. I wanted to sail when I was in grammar school....Now I am actually at sea--as a passenger, of course, but at sea nevertheless--and bound for Ecuador. Strange--or is it?--that childish hopes should be answered in the will of God for this [mission] now?"</span><br />
<span class="userContent">-Jim Elliot</span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">Strange--or is it?-- that childish hopes should be answered in the will of God.</span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">When I was young, I dreamed of being a pioneer-- wearing long skirts, cooking on a wood stove, growing food and harvesting it, making my own clothing. I played at these things for hours, read books about them, dressed up accordingly for Halloween. And here I am now, long skirts, cooking on a wood stove (actually several wood stoves, since we're cooking for about 70 people), eating food that we've grown here on the base, washing my laundry by hand in a tub of water and pulling it in off the line before the afternoon downpours get to it. I love it just as much as I thought I would.</span>Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-9887561674188000172012-08-25T00:19:00.001-07:002012-08-25T00:19:44.792-07:00The day-to-dayI've now been in Uganda for a week and a day, which is a little hard to believe-- feels like a lifetime. My computer is broken, which is both a good and a bad thing. We have wifi on the base, and if I had a functional computer I think I would likely spend way too much time on it. The way it is, I can use my iPod to read emails (and write short ones), and then I can borrow a computer from time to time to Skype, blog, and write lengthier emails. So it's the weekend, and most everyone else has headed into town, and I'm staying back here to catch up with the outside world. All this to say: get used to several blog updates in a couple days, and then nothing for a while.<br />
<br />
I'll start with the easiest things to describe-- the day-to-day life.<br />
<br />
5:30 a.m. Wake up, wash face & brush teeth, get dressed and bundle up a little-- it's been cold in the mornings!<br />
<br />
6:00 a.m. Head outside for quiet time. It's still dark at this point, so I go and find a quiet spot to sit and pray and wait for the sun to rise. Lately I've been sitting on the edge of the (red dirt) basketball court, overlooking the soccer fields, forests, hills, villages, and Lake Victoria. I sit and pray for a half hour or so, watch the consistently breathtaking sunrise, listen to the monkeys and crickets and unfamiliar birds, and ask God what He has for the day. Once the sun is up, I read a bit-- I've been reading in John and Proverbs in the Bible, and My Utmost for His Highest. So good.<br />
<br />
7:30 a.m. Breakfast. We have two white bread rolls, with either margarine or homemade peanut butter (my favorite), a banana or a hard-boiled egg, and a cup of spiced milk tea.<br />
<br />
8:30 a.m. Worship or prayer time, either as a school or as a whole base. My favorite so far was when they had each nation represented (10 total) come forward and lead a worship song from their own country.<br />
<br />
9:30 a.m. Lecture. We've had a speaker from America this week, but each week will be someone different. The lectures have been so good, so challenging and inspiring and informative. I feel like each day this week God has brought up something that has completely transformed my thinking and living in one area or another. It's so hard to believe it's only the first week!<br />
<br />
11:00 a.m. Break tea. I don't know why it's called "break tea" and not "tea break", but it is what it is. We have another cup of milk tea or instant coffee and another roll or bread and butter or mandaazi (like a less-sweet donut) or something similar.<br />
<br />
11:30 a.m. Lecture. There's so much information that it's really nice to have that break in the middle.<br />
<br />
1:00 p.m. Lunch. Lunch and dinner are usually very similar, a combination of four or five of the following: rice, pasta, potatoes, posho (a mash of white corn flour cooked in water), matoke (cooked green bananas), beans, cooked cabbage, avocados, pineapple, watermelon, and very occasionally some sort of meat (I think we had lamb last night) or my favorite: chapati. Chapati is a fried flatbread, kind of like a thick, flavorful flour tortilla, only a thousand times better.<br />
<br />
2:30 p.m. Group time. Later on, this will be small groups to discuss what we're learning in the lectures, but this first couple of weeks we're staying together as a large group. We sit in a big circle and each person takes a turn to share their life story. With 43 people ranging in age from 17 to about 40 years old, coming from the US, UK, Austria, Czech Republic, South Korea, Congo, Rwanda, Kenya, Tanzania, and Uganda, this is an amazing time of getting to hear such different stories. Wednesday was an especially powerful time. In many East African cultures, public displays of vulnerability or emotion are very uncommon, and people instead keep things to themselves and just say they are fine. But on Wednesday, several different Ugandans shared their full life stories, heartbreaking stories, even in tears. If we're starting a precedent of that kind of openness in the first week, I can't wait to see what God will be able to do with this group over the next five months of sharing life together.<br />
<br />
3:30 p.m. Work duty. We haven't started this yet (we get one week as a guest), but we'll be helping clean or garden or cook or do anything else around the base that needs to be done. I've never hoed a garden in a skirt before-- it's an interesting prospect.<br />
<br />
5:30 p.m. Free time. This can involve napping, singing, talking, reading the 10 chapters a day we're supposed to read from the Bible, playing basketball or soccer or frisbee, or teaching the Africans any of a number of great games such as spoons or Uno. Always a good time. I've been singing lots, and yesterday had a ukulele lesson with a Tanzanian guy (I was teaching him).<br />
<br />
7:30 p.m. Dinner. Basically the same as lunch.<br />
<br />
8:00 p.m. After-dinner activities... sometimes a social event (this week we played duck duck goose and bobbing for apples) or worship time, sometimes an unofficial dance party to the Lion King soundtrack, you really never know.<br />
<br />
10:00 p.m. Lights out. However, it is on very rare occasions that I am still awake at 10. I generally end up falling asleep sometime between 8:30 and 9:30.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-90532668525135217132012-08-18T05:39:00.000-07:002012-08-18T05:39:35.489-07:00On beingWe dropped through the clouds and Lake Victoria slid into view. The hills and jungles came into focus, rusty red clay and deep green banana trees. Cattle and goats surrounding the runway, unimpressed by the jet landing thirty feet away from their heads, and it all came back to me. I love this place.<br />
<br />
The transition is hard. I'm constantly surprised and a little taken aback by the range of emotions I experience in any given hour. I love this place, but I miss so much about home. I'm enjoying getting to know the people here, but I don't know them yet, and I don't know how to share this experience with them. Everything is new. I have to be humble and have quite a sense of humor about it all: Excuse me, sir, I don't know how to fill up my water bottle... can you help me?<br />
<br />
There's still so much I don't know about the coming eight months. Right now, especially, as we wait for everyone to arrive, there is no schedule, the schools are all on break, and there's really nothing to do. The Western mindset rebels against this: get on Facebook! Watch a movie! Make a to-do list and then do all the things on it! Go out for coffee! DO something!<br />
<br />
But when you push past this (like dropping through the clouds), there's gold to be found. We (as Westerners) have lost the ability to just be. I'm finding it again. Reading, meditating, praying, singing, talking, but also just being, with the sun on my feet and the stickiness of humidity on my skin and the smooth clay dust on my fingers and the unfamiliar birdsongs in my ears. Wherever I end up after all the adventures, I want to know how to <b>be.</b>Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-70790987199590478892012-08-16T06:10:00.001-07:002012-08-16T06:10:51.266-07:00Grace in my heart and flowers in my hairAnd there will come a time, you'll see<br />
with no more tears.<br />
And love will not break your heart<br />
but dismiss your fears.<br />
Get over your hill and see<br />
what you find there,<br />
with grace in your heart<br />
and flowers in your hair.<br />
-Mumford and Sons<br />
<br />
This song just about sums up the transition. Goodbyes are hard. Leaving the familiar is hard, especially when the familiar is also wonderful.<br />
<br />
But it's worth it. It's worth it to love, even when it makes the goodbyes harder. It's worth it to take a risk, even though there's that moment of limbo before the path becomes clear. It's worth it to go full-tilt after the dream.<br />
<br />
Right now, I can't quite see over the hill in front of me. I'm exhausted-- mentally, physically, and emotionally spent. On my flight to London, I found myself trying to muster up the strength to be... something. To be ready, or prepared, or enough, or excited, or something.<br />
<br />
And then I realized that I have what I need. I am enough. He, in me, is enough. I don't have to be anything other than myself, exactly where I am.<br />
<br />
So, with grace in my heart and flowers in my hair, I will climb this hill of goodbyes and letting-go and transition, and I will see what worlds I find beyond it. I'm not quite excited, at the moment. That's honesty. But I have what I need, and I'm trusting the process. Easy and safe were never part of the promise, but the promise is good.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-5406272958744473442012-06-06T11:55:00.000-07:002012-06-06T11:55:37.640-07:00All that's necessaryChrist be with me, Christ within me,<br />
Christ behind me, Christ before me,<br />
Christ beside me, Christ to win me,<br />
Christ to comfort and restore me,<br />
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,<br />
Christ in quiet, Christ in danger,<br />
Christ in hearts of all that love me,<br />
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.<br />
-St. Patrick<br />
<br />
You are my adventure and my co-adventurer. You are at once my destination and my companion. You are my purpose and all I need for the journey. You are the joy set before me and the peace within me.<br />
<br />
You hem me in, behind and before, and lay Your hand upon me.<br />
-Psalm 139:5Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-40093990055497651892012-06-05T17:34:00.000-07:002012-06-06T07:28:10.238-07:00The official support letter<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<b>Dear family, friends, brothers and sisters in Christ,</b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
Thank you for taking the time to
read this update on the exciting plans God has given me for this year!</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b>The short and sweet: </b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
A<b> 7-9 month training, serving, encouraging, and vision-casting journey
to Uganda & the UK.</b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b>The details:</b></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
From August 2012-January 2013, I
will be in a <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Discipleship</b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> Training School</b>
(DTS) in Jinja, Uganda, with <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Youth with a Mission</b> (YWAM) at their Hopeland base there. YWAM
describes the purpose of a DTS as “to encourage committed Christians into a
deeper personal relationship with the Lord, thus equipping them to serve Him in
whatever capacity He calls them to. It is also an introduction to the values of
YWAM and a chance to explore the opportunities we can offer to develop a
calling into missions.”</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
Following the DTS, my plan is to
spend another month in Uganda,<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> visiting other YWAM bases and ministries</b>.
After this, I’ll stop in the UK
on the way home for as long as finances allow (anywhere from 1-3 months), <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">visiting YWAM bases, family, and friends
all over the UK and Ireland</b>.
I’m especially interested in spending some time at YWAM Paisley, a base in Scotland that
focuses on living in creative, worshipful, intentional community. I also hope
to have the opportunity to visit my cousins in Northern
Ireland and to visit friends in Galway, Ireland,
where I studied abroad in high school.</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b>What's the point of all this? </b></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
As I’ve prayed and planned and
prepared over the past year or so, the vision has slowly come together for this
journey. <span style="font-size: small;"><b>The purpose of the trip is
fourfold</b>, which is great, because I like bull<span style="font-family: inherit;">et points.</span></span></div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="-moz-font-feature-settings: normal; -moz-font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"></span><b>Training:
</b>Having never had any formal Bible teaching, I am so excited to do a DTS—<b>intensive study and biblical teaching for
three months</b>, followed by <b>two months
of application</b> on the DTS outreach. And all of this in a non-Western
setting—such a source of perspective and depth!</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="-moz-font-feature-settings: normal; -moz-font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"></span><b>Serving:
</b>During the DTS, I’ll be able to use my gifts, my training, and my willing hands
to <b>partner with YWAM Uganda in the
amazing work they are already doing and lighten their load in any way I can</b>.
In my travels following the DTS, I will also happily <b>offer my services, skills, & training in any way I can be useful to
the bases I visit, working for my keep.</b></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="-moz-font-feature-settings: normal; -moz-font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"></span><b>Encouraging:
</b>it can be such a breath of life to have a visitor, to hear stories of how God
is moving across the world, to share commonalities across cultures, <b>to laugh and learn and worship together and
minister to each other.</b> “Like cold water to a thirsty soul, so is good news
from a far country.” (Proverbs 25:25) I feel incredibly privileged to get to be
that breath of life.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="-moz-font-feature-settings: normal; -moz-font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"></span><b>Vision-casting:</b>
the vision-casting aspect of this journey is both personal and corporate.
Personally, I’m <b>wide open to the
possibility of long-term ministry in any of these locations</b>. Both Uganda and the UK have been on my heart for years,
and I’m eager to see what my future looks like in relation to those places. On
a larger scale, I look forward to <b>fostering
the partnerships God is waiting to build between ministries and members of the
Church across the world</b>. One of my great passions in life is to see the
Body of Christ realized in the fullness of the way He planned it.</span></li>
</ul>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>In closing:</b> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I feel like this journey is </span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">the beginning of a new season of really walking
in the dreams </span>God has for my life, using all the gifts an</span>d training and
blessings and passion He has given to me</b>. I feel incredibly blessed to be
walking in the footsteps of such believers as Paul, getting to see the bigger
picture of what God is doing worldwide and working to weave stronger
connections among His Bride, while having the honor of meeting and sharing
fellowship with so many diverse brothers and sisters in the faith.<b> </b><br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<b>Partnership</b>:</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
With all of the ways God has opened
doors and confirmed His heart for this plan, I have no doubts that every penny
will come in in His perfect order. That said, I am in the process of fundraising. I’ve been blessed this year
with great jobs that have allowed me to put a good deal away in savings, but as
of June 5<sup>th</sup>, I still need to raise about $2000 more for these nine
months or so (plane tickets, the DTS, visits to other bases in Uganda and the
UK). Please pray about it and give only what the Lord leads you to give—I can't wait
to watch Him supply every need!<br />
<br />
I am also support-raising, which
is even more exciting. This is the part where I get to travel around, spend
time with so many amazing people, share what God's doing in my heart and life
and in Uganda and the UK, and build connections with the Body. I’ll be leaving
the States in mid-August, so if you'd like a phone call, email, Skype, or real
live visit, or if your <span class="il">church</span> really loves missionaries,
let me know and we'll figure something out! This is my favorite part. Except
the part where I'll be traveling all over the world, chasing the dreams God has
put in my heart. That’s my real favorite part.</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b>More information:</b><br />
<a href="http://www.ywam.org/">www.ywam.org</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ywamhopeland.com/">www.ywamhopeland.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ywamuganda.org/">www.ywamuganda.org</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ywampaisley.org/">www.ywampaisley.org</a><b><br /></b><br />
<br />
<b>Contacting me:</b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
Leave a note here and I will gladly get back to you! If you're not a member of my mailing list and would like to be, just let me know!</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
Grace and peace to you from our sweet
Lord Jesus, blessings on your families, life to your hearts, and favor on the
work of your hands.</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b>Molly K. McKinney</b> </div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-84688824126438298902012-06-02T15:15:00.001-07:002012-06-02T15:15:23.124-07:00I made a choiceI made a choice to be here.<br />
I made a choice to be 25, single, and transient.<br />
I made a choice to live on the mountaintops and not on the highways.<br />
I made a choice to feed the dreamer and chase the rainbows and go for broke.<br />
<br />
Some days it's hard to remember. Some days, after twelve hours of packing and moving (knowing I'll do it all again at least twice more before summer's end), it's hard to see anything but frustration. Some days, saying goodbye and feeling my heart stretch and tear yet again, it starts to feel like a curse. Like this is something that has happened to me. It's easy to fall into self-pity.<br />
<br />
But I made a choice.<br />
<br />
I looked at the paths. I explored the options open to me. Presented with the opportunity for comfort and consistency, I let my mind and my heart wander hand-in-hand down that wide, level road (it wasn't hard to see where it was headed). As the vision wandered on, I saw my mind and heart always comfortable, the routine always consistent and predictable, and no life to be found. Mind grew anxious and given to fits of whining for lack of anything else to talk about, heart turned gray and bleak and screamed with gasping little breaths for something more.<br />
<br />
I recoiled and pulled them back just in time, and rolled them down another path. The winding, climbing, rambling, narrow path where "If only..." gives way to "What if..." which teases back with "Okay, when?" and is met with a resounding "Well, why not now?" They followed this path, cartwheeling and leaping and gaining speed. And they faced scraped knees and tears and having the wind knocked out of them on a frighteningly regular basis, but their hearts (the heart of my heart, the heart of my mind) pounded and their blood flowed and their cheeks glowed and no one could question if they were alive.<br />
<br />
And so I made a choice.<br />
<br />
I was created a dreamer. I was created a live wire, a loose cannon, a dangerous equation of imagination and impulsivity. I was created with a million "what if"s firing constantly across the night sky of my mind, with the willingness to engage them, with the stubbornness to chase them and pin them down. I was created with a knack for jumping in with both feet and very little natural talent for patiently testing the waters. And this knack has landed me in pits and mud puddles and surrounded by crocodiles, and it has landed me on trampolines that have flung me into the greatest adventures.<br />
<br />
I was created this way, I say, but I made a choice to engage, to accept, to throw open my arms and embrace it.<br />
<br />
This is not a sorry circumstance, this is not a feather blown by the wind for lack of the gumption to make a decision, this is not a holding pattern until I figure it all out.<br />
<br />
I made a choice to stay a dreamer, in the company of dreamers, chasing after the greatest Dreamer.<br />
<br />
And I would make that choice again.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-90076997548715087442012-05-15T23:16:00.003-07:002012-05-15T23:16:57.292-07:0025A good measure, pressed down and running over.<br />
<br />
If I were to stumble over what I have not, what I am leaving, what I am waiting for, I would miss:<br />
-All my kiddos' sticky, sweaty hands and hugs<br />
-The simple joy of the moment, being a tourist in my own town on lunch break and enjoying an affogato <br />
-All the daily chances to throw my head back and belly laugh<br />
-Each bite of a meal made on purpose<br />
-The support of my beautiful friends, and the love and wisdom in each word they say<br />
-The satisfaction of small successes<br />
-Hot pavement, warm air, cool breezes at sunset-- the first real days of summer.<br />
<br />
At 25, let me live each day, receive it with hope and farewell it with gratitude, and pack it away in an arsenal of reasons to rejoice.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-39148197999930812122012-03-17T08:46:00.003-07:002012-03-17T08:46:35.949-07:00Uganda & Kony 2012 For the past fourteen months or so, Uganda's been on my heart again (I spent two months there in 2007). Since last May, I've been praying about the possibility of returning there for a longer period of time, and since June I've been looking into opportunities with YWAM Uganda (www.ywamuganda.org). Since August, it has been my hope to head to Uganda at some point in 2012 for a discipleship training school (DTS)-- a six-month school that starts with three months of studying Scripture and the character of God and how He relates to the situations found in Uganda, and then continues with two or three months of outreach as a means of blessing communities elsewhere in East Africa.<br />
<br />
So that's my background. I don't claim to have a ton of authority, but I love Uganda, and I have a little more experience with and personal investment in the country and the people than your average American 20-something-year-old.<br />
<br />
That said, I was very intrigued when a video about Uganda and its struggles began showing up all over my Facebook page a few weeks ago.<br />
<br />
Having looked into it a little further, here's where I stand. <span class="commentBody" data-jsid="text">I'm obviously all about
ending the use of child soldiers and sex slaves. But I'm also about
doing it in a real, transparent, Christ-like, holistic, lasting way.
I do appreciate Invisible Children's work in just plain getting the
word ou<span class="text_exposed_show"><span>t. But my heart is to see
people really look into the issue beyond the user-friendly,
one-time-only involvement fads, and find a way (be it praying, going,
giving, advocating/sharing/</span><wbr></wbr><span class="word_break"></span>speaking up) to contribute to lasting change.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span class="commentBody" data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">If your heart has been stirred up by the Kony 2012 video and the very real heartbreak of the people of Uganda, praise God. Do a little research, and find a way to contribute to an organization that's there on the ground, operating in a sustainable and realistic, practical, transparent way, seeking to rebuild and sow forgiveness, reconciliation, and healing rather than vengeance.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span class="commentBody" data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">You can start by reading the following articles for a little more information and inspiration, and practical places to start.</span></span><br />
<span class="commentBody" data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> </span></span><br />
<a href="http://tumblr.thedailywh.at/post/18909727859/on-kony-2012-i-honestly-wanted-to-stay-as-far%20">A good basic rundown on the situation in Uganda and the Invisible Children organization</a><br />
<a href="http://fromtheunpavedroad.com/2012/03/08/what-does-it-mean-to-love-our-enemies-really/%20">A beautiful perspective by an amazing woman on the ground in South Sudan, just above the Ugandan border</a><br />
<a href="http://fromtheunpavedroad.com/2012/03/09/live-free/">A follow-up from the above woman (Michele Perry) with action steps</a><br />
<a href="http://kissthejoyasitflies.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/responding-to-kony-2012/">One more resource for information on IC, the reality of Uganda, and practical ways to help</a><br />
<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-52536635827804064222012-02-02T22:36:00.000-08:002012-02-02T22:36:31.180-08:00YouThe more I want you<br />
the more I am determined<br />
to have you and only you<br />
<br />
Because I desire gold<br />
I am tempted with all things that glitter<br />
but you are worth the waiting<br />
<br />
I will not numb my senses<br />
with counterfeits and half-measures<br />
I will wait for you.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-10949681657228878192012-02-02T22:35:00.000-08:002012-02-02T22:35:50.798-08:00Having done all, to stand firmEven as we await the outcome, we can praise You in the midst of the furnace-- praise You that You stand with us even in the fire, praise You that we are being refined, praise You that the breaking point is higher than we imagined, that we are made of stronger stuff than we imagined, and certainly of stronger stuff than when we began.<br />
<br />
I need righteousness more than I need to be right<br />
I love Your wisdom more than I love my own light<br />
So I lay me open before You<br />
I lay me open, coming just to implore You<br />
Search me, O God, and know my heart<br />
Try me, and know my anxious thoughts<br />
Test me and see if any wicked way there be,<br />
I lay me open, I lay me open.<br />
<br />
Praise You that You are just and wise and merciful, slow to anger and rich in love. Praise You that You discipline the ones You love, allowing hardship and hurt and confusion to refine us, but not to ruin us. Praise You and proclaim that, whatever the outcome, You are good and Your mercy endures forever.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-92105004805360945622012-01-19T13:25:00.000-08:002012-01-19T13:25:50.545-08:00Addiction to fictionYou're bringing into focus<br />
my addiction<br />
to fiction<br />
My succumbing to the siren-song<br />
of someone else's life<br />
Just how easy it can be<br />
to lose myself<br />
mis-invest my wealth<br />
<br />
to waste the minutes<br />
(and miss the Moments)<br />
investing time and interest<br />
in pixel-fabricated quests.<br />
<br />
Will I one day wake<br />
and wonder at the fact<br />
that I've missed my own path<br />
forgotten entirely<br />
to bring to life the history<br />
You had in mind while dreaming me?<br />
<br />
(My own, complicated travels<br />
may take more than ninety minutes to unravel<br />
but the salt of sweat<br />
and iron of blood<br />
is real--<br />
Never let me forget what it is<br />
to feel.)<br />
<br />
But bless You, You're pursuing me<br />
wooing me<br />
into marriage with reality<br />
Gritted-teeth commitment to face here and now<br />
with shoulders squared, feet firm on the bow<br />
and arms thrown wide<br />
I'll laugh with the sea-spray on my face<br />
give thanks to You in every place<br />
open my eyes<br />
and enjoy the ride<br />
<br />
Father, let Your voice<br />
narrate the mysteries<br />
wilder than fiction<br />
truer than history<br />
I'll let Your love-song<br />
be the soundtrack to my life.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-42494332525247296942012-01-05T18:56:00.000-08:002012-01-05T18:56:48.428-08:00EpicI'm restless again. The part of me that resonates deeply with epic stories gets stirred up from time to time, so that the routine and the mundane become like shackles I can't wait to shake off and run far and fast just because I can, and to know that I can. I try to satiate the restlessness with travel, with physical challenge, with new mental territory. Always beforehand it seems like just the right journey will cure it, just the right new mountain to climb will call it satisfied. But I'm learning that it's my innate connection to a greater epic, and it won't be filled by anything this earth can give.<br />
<br />
I serve the God that has placed eternity in the hearts of men, and has also kept it, for the time being, just out of their reach. Cruel? Maybe it seems so, but it's what keeps us striving, keeps us alive. If we could grasp it so quickly, what else would there be to live for?<br />
<br />
At this juncture, and every time I come to this place again in this life, the only answer is to dive into the One who tantalizes us with a loftier purpose than anything satiable. The epic is dear to His heart, and He is the greatest storyteller... I will burrow deeper into Him and await the unfolding, knowing that He will fulfill what is in His heart and what He has placed in mine.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7879515181587811904.post-85996733359589394462012-01-02T07:53:00.000-08:002012-01-02T07:53:05.771-08:002012, or Positioned for GreatnessI slept enough last night (after drifting off while meditating on the throne room) and woke up early this morning (drifting back into awareness through the same place). I woke up with joy and anticipation, ready for work and for life. Two weeks of interruption from the routine have refreshed my gratitude for it-- I can't wait to see my sweet and quirky kiddos today, I forgot how inspiring and refreshing my friends and housemates are, I forgot how good it feels to wake up in your own bed and know where the makings for coffee are.<br />
<br />
Laura Hackett sings about grace and forgiveness and how Your kindness is so much greater than we know. You've been calling me into more, showing me the potential You've put in me and letting me know You're ready to release it if I'll only show myself willing. In this very house sleep some of the best possible companions for the journey.<br />
<br />
I am rested, awake, refreshed, renewed in perspective, and taking ten minutes to cradle a cup of coffee in both hands while I ponder Your love and how it is mine and brings all things into my reach. In rest and quietude and peace, seated in Your lap, I am positioned for greatness.<br />
<br />
With inspiration and resolution comes an intensifying of the battle, but I want to live this year from this place. Seated in Your lap, I am in the heartbeat of the action, but I am safer than I could ever be on the sidelines.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14856733485616022225noreply@blogger.com0